Birth - The Husband's point of view

Caren wakes me up at 3am Sunday morning saying she's been having constant contractions and cramping that felt different and more serious than other "false contractions" she's had. I was thinking (our baby's not due for another 11 days and ah man he's coming right now? It's 3am! But I was also very excited). So I got up and we tried to start timing the contractions for about an hour. They were kind of random and not all that consistent as far as timing goes. She said she couldn't exactly tell when a contraction was starting. Caren texted our midwife Lisa to let her know the situation and we tried to lie down so Caren could have some energy for the laboring process. I laid down and fell back asleep pretty quick, but Caren couldn't sleep so she got up and talked to her Mom and other random people on the computer. I then got woken up at 7:30 by Caren saying "Honey if I'm going to be up you've got to be up" and she said that the contractions have gotten a bit more intense. I got up and we started timing them again. Caren was saying "We can go ahead and go to church, then labor at home for a while" but as she would go through a contraction she would moan somewhat loudly and we decided that going to church probably wouldn't be the best idea. I can't imagine the random moaning going on during the sermon...so the contractions were about 4-5min apart and lasted between 50-80 seconds. Caren texted the midwife to tell her the situation and told us to come in whenever we were ready. When about 9:30 rolled around, Caren decided it was getting a little too intense and wanted to go ahead and head up to the birthing center.

I think I was just in shock that this was all already happening...and we both were still somewhat doubting that this was actually the real thing. So we drove up there and Caren was going through some contractions wondering why we were hitting every red light. Meanwhile I kept reminding her that these pains were all normal and this was how God made childbirth to be. I think...at least I hope that that was helping her. We arrived at the birth center just after 10am. We went inside and I could tell that Caren was getting in more and more pain and I just kept praying for God to make this as easy as labor could be. Our midwife Lisa looked to see how dilated Caren was and she was at 3cm. We were somewhat bummed because it sounded like she still had a long way to go. We then went upstairs into a bedroom that we wanted to stay in and Caren sat on an exercise ball. Then I think we both realized that this was the real thing....this was actually happening right now....it was a mixture of emotions. For me it was exciting and I was a bit worried for Caren because I knew she didn't get much sleep and I thought this was going to be a marathon labor that would last like 24+ hours or something. Plus I knew that her pain tolerance is not very high so this would be a whole new ballgame...

So she's sitting on this ball going through these contractions and we were just sitting there and Caren said this is boring. So Lisa told us they had movies we could watch. We end up putting in the Father of the Bride and I decide to run out and pick up a burger and a bunch of tacos from Jack in the Box (with permission from my wife and Lisa of course) to last me for this whole marathon. I left and came back and sure enough this labor was no longer "boring". Caren was starting to be in a lot of pain meanwhile our phones are blowing up from people wanting an update, which I thought was hilarious. Everytime she would go through a contraction I would try and rub her back and press on this heat pack (which was hot rice in a big sock) on her lower back. Now what was funny was that I had never seen Father of the Bride before and I was actually getting interested in watching the movie lol! So I was like whoa Ryan focus on your wife here!!! So God gave me a quick slap to the back of the head to get me sucked out of the movie.

Caren then had another contraction and she said she felt like she was going to throw up. So Lisa runs to get a big bowl and I saw that she was starting to spew a bit, I then ran over and cupped my hands to catch her vomit so it wouldn't get all over the birthing center's carpet. I think Caren really tried to hold off until the big bowl came over but she couldn't and vomited right in my hands. Then the bowl came like 4 seconds later...then I was thinking, Wow...I hate throw up, I can't believe I had the impulse reaction to catch her vomit and it didn't even bother me at all. I realized I must be in like Survival Mode or something. Anyways then Caren apologized quite a bit for doing that.

At this point the fun was over, Caren was no longer smiling at all, no longer wanted to joke, it was all business and straight-faced because the pain was getting to be too much. Lisa then talked Caren into taking a warm shower, so we went up there and she got in the shower somehow and was in there for about 15 minutes and kept telling me that she was scared. I kept telling her to not be scared and that this is all classic labor pain stuff. This is how God made it to be, it's in God's hands, it's all normal stuff. I think this helped a little but she was still fearful. She then got out of the shower and was in quite a bit of pain. So I asked if she wanted to get in the bed in the bedroom. She got into the bed and would have a pretty ridiculous contraction then would doze off in the bed....this pattern repeated for about an hour and a half. While she would doze I was praying over and over in my head asking God to make this happen quick and easy if it was His will. I kept telling Him "you know Caren can't tolerate much pain...please, please just help her get through this. Please...we're your children...you know us...we can't do this without you." and that was some awesome God time and he delivered! So after this Caren asked if there was another position she could try and Lisa told her she could try the ball again. So Caren was on the bed still and was on her knees leaning on the ball and she had another contraction, and her moaning on this one sounded like extreme pain mixed with a desperation cry. It made my heart sink but I knew that this was classic labor stuff. So then Caren cried out "Can I get in the tub now?!!" So Lisa told her she needed to check her to make sure she was far enough along. Lisa looked and by the grace of God she went from 4cm at 1pm to 9.5cm at 4pm! So she said she could get in the tub. We all then helped Caren down the hall to the tub and Caren said she had the urge to push and Lisa said to go ahead.

Caren then somehow made it to the tub and I could tell she was just ready for this baby to get the heck out. At this point I was very excited!!! I knew that this was it! So Caren would get the urge to push and her phone seriously went off like every 4-5 minutes and Caren said "I hate that phone!" funny stuff. (of course it wasn't at the time). So I was kneeling on the end of the tub closet to her head and Lisa was on the other end and I was holding Caren's hand and she would SQUEEZE and pull pretty hard! But she was doing awesome and every time she would push we would encourage her that she was doing so well. So then she got the urge to push again and this baby came out of nowhere! Lisa was like oh geez! and told me to pick the baby up and put it on Caren, so I picked up the baby and put it on Caren and Caren's face was priceless. I think she was in a random state of bewilderment that this baby was suddenly lying on her! Then I was like YOU DID IT and it took a good couple of seconds for her to realize what just happened. Then we were like what is it, what is it? Then Lisa said take a look Daddy, so I looked at the "area" and said IT'S A BOY! IT'S AARON JOSHUA! It was awesome. So all the pain and stuff was nothing in comparison to this creation by God that was lying on his mommy.

To summarize I would say it was very uncomfortable seeing my wife go through more pain then she has ever been through in her entire life, but it was awesome to see the birth of our son. God really helped Caren through this, I believe he allowed Caren to go into labor early so the baby wouldn't be quite as big as a "normal" baby and He made the labor only last from start to finish a total of less than 15 hours, which is pretty good for a first baby. So God is awesome!!